I've decided that I'm going to go back to being vegetarian. I'm also going to cut out sugar, cheese and sour cream. Cut a lot of crap out. I'll just have to buy a few extras when I go grocery shopping, but it'll balance because I'll only be buying half the meat. I need some really good vegetarian recipes. Or, I could just buy meat substitutes. We'll see what happens. Being vegetarian makes me feel better. This is going to drive Jason crazy though. I'm going to get the standard "You're not going to make me be vegetarian!" from him. His brain exploded when he found out I made half hamburger/half tofu meatloaf. So, I'll just work on myself. I don't care if he or Brandon eat sugar or meat or whatever. I'm just going to live healthy now. I remember when I did this before. Last time I didn't cut out cheese or sour cream. It was good though. Apathy is the greatest challenge with this. The problem is when you just stop caring, you give up. You go back to sugar and stuff. I always loved the look of admiration/jealousy I got when I told people I didn't eat sugar. They'd be like "Wow! I could NEVER give up ice cream!" Well, I can. I'm sick of being so out of control. I need to make this right. I wonder why more people don't take control of their lives. So, tomorrow starts a brand new chapter.

I'm ready.

Why is it so fucking hard to say no to food? I'm not even hungry, but the bacon from Jason's breakfast feels like it's calling me. I'm pathetic.